Better Than

Discworld Monthly - Issue 146: June 2009

Table of Contents:

1. Editorial
2. News
3. Readers' Letters
4. DiscTrivia
5. Discworld Street Names
6. Competition
7. Article: My Experience Painting Discworld Miniatures
8. The End

1. Editorial

Welcome to issue 146. It has been a fairly quiet month in Discworld terms but very busy in my personal life. This month's issue is a little smaller than usual due to the lack of reviews and also the fact that I only started writing on the evening of bank holiday Monday (the glorious 25th May).

The good news is that Terry recently posted on Twitter that Unseen Academicals is finally finished. Well sort of, the exact line was:

"Okay, that's it. We've just reached the end of Unseen Academicals. THE END. Now all we've got to do is go back and do all the back-filling."

Which is of course great news. It seems like a long time since we last had the pleasure of reading a new Discworld novel.

Last month in my review of the Wincanton April Shower event I mentioned that Demdike provided a knitted Death of Rats for the charity auction. Demdike got in contact to point out that she didn't design the pattern. The free design was in fact downloaded from

Don't forget, if you visit a play or a talk and would like to let the world know about it, please feel free to email your review to and we will consider it for publication.

Jason Anthony (Editor)
William Barnett (Welshman Abroad)
Richard Massey (Temporary Deputy Editor)

2. News

New update about the Going Postal adaptation by producer Rod Brown from PJSM Prints new page (

Our good friend Rod Brown from Mob Films has just sent the following update via Rob;

Dear Rob,

Just a note to say all is progressing on schedule towards starting filming Going Postal, which is now only a matter of weeks away.

Base camp is set up in Budapest with Jon and the troops making their way there as we speak, however the filming schedule, which I did anticipate at this time is being juggled, to allow one or two locations to decide when they can fit us in for filming and for the Golems to be ready for filming action... I'm learning quickly that they may be nice guys those Golems and totally reliable, but they take an age to walk anywhere!

Regarding the much anticipated fan day, I think this is likely to be a mid August day, but more on this as the schedule firms up.

Kind regards,


Rod Brown
Mob Films

Update from Colin Smythe:

More information about the new animated version of Truckers.


I missed this at the time it appeared in March

Terry in the news in May.

Terry hits out at counties with lack of memory clinics:

Terry on new 50% tax bracket in The Times.

Discworld Dates...

This section will contain events that you need to keep in your diary. Entries will remain until they go out of date. New entries will include the word [New] next to them. If this section gets too large we will start pruning entries.

[UK] Lords and Ladies will be performed on Tuesday, May 5 to Saturday, July 25 at The Pomegranate Theatre, Chesterfield; Buxton Opera House; Theatre Royal, Winchester by Tabs Productions.

Performances start at 7:30pm.

For more details:

[UK, Updated] The Broken Drummers is a London Discworld Group that meets once a month on a Monday evening. Membership is free - just come along. New members and visitors to London are both welcome and encouraged.

June's meeting will be on Monday 8th June at The Monkey Puzzle, Paddington, London, W2 1JQ.


[UK] The Purple Theatre Company will be performing "Monstrous Regiment" from Wednesday 17th June - Saturday 20th June 2009 at 7:30pm at The Compass Theatre, Ickenham.

Tickets cost 11 GBP with opening night tickets at 9 GBP. Concessions available Thursday only at 9 GBP.

Box Office - 01895 673200 (open Mon - Fri 10:30 - 17:00, Sat 10:00 - 13:00)


[SA, New] Irene Dramatic Society will be performing Carpe Jugulum on June 19th, 20th, 26th and 27th at Irene Village Hall, Irene (in the Centurion/Pretoria area) at 7.30pm. Tickets are R40 each. For bookings and information please contact Pat Goddard on 012 6653651 or cell no. 0834617580. e-mail

[UK] The Discworld stamps' 5th birthday party, Wincanton will take place over the weekend of the 11 - 12 July 2009.


[UK, New] Collingwood RSC will be putting Terry Pratchett's "The Fifth Elephant" on stage at The NEW THEATRE ROYAL, Portsmouth. Box Office 02392 649000

The dates are Tuesday 14 July till Saturday 18 July 2009 with a curtain at 19:30.

We are holding a Discworld Themed fancy dress on Friday 17 July.

[DE] The German Discworld Convention 2009 will take place at Castle Bilstein from August the 14th to the 16th. The festival will be Unseen University themed. Registration and more information can be found in form of a bilingual wiki at:

[UK] Wadfest - "Wadstock" - Music With Rocks In takes place on 21st, 22nd and 23rd August 2009 at Trentfield Farm, Church Laneham, Retford, Nottinghamshire, DN22 0NJ.

Tickets cost 20.00 GBP per adult for the weekend including events.

More information at:

[US] The First North American Discworld Convention will take place from September 4-7, 2009 in Phoenix, Arizona.

For more information visit

[UK, New] Twyford and Ruscombe Theatre Group will be performing Wyrd Sisters on October 8th, 9th & 10th from 8pm.

More details at:

[IRL, New] The Irish Discworld Convention will be held on the 6th to the 9th November in the Falls Hotel Ennistymon, Co. Clare, Ireland. Visit for more information.

Small Ads...

Please note, DWM has no way of checking the veracity or validity of any of the items in our small ads section. As always, exercise caution when giving out your details over the Internet. We *strongly* recommend parental supervision for younger readers who
follow up any of these contacts.

Karen Legge writes: Notice of forthcoming sale of discworld items on ebay to run from Friday 5th June to Thusday 11th June any questions then please email.


Verence and Magrat Royal Wedding Commemorative Champagne Flutes - Only 50 pairs made.

Boxed pair of crystal champagne flutes, ribbon has pin badge with the Lancre coat of arms Box also contains more information on the flutes Amazing collectors piece - very sad sale. Flutes have never been out of the box. Box and sleeve also in perfect condition.

Also a range of Discworld diaries dating back to 1999 and a range of Clarecraft figures.

Anna Kirson writes: Hello! I'm planing a trip to Australia in a few months, and I've been trying to find Pratchett fan clubs or fan groups there. For some reason the web keeps sending me to old interview publications... Could you maybe point me in the right direction? I'm looking for someone to contact around Sydney or Melbourne.

3. Readers' Letters

If you have any letters or comments, please email them to

We assume any correspondence is eligible for use in the newsletter unless otherwise stated, including the sender's email address. We may also edit your letters buy feeding them to dung beetles.

It is vitally important that you don't pass off other people's work as your own. If you use information from other resources please let us know so we can give proper credit.

The best letter of the month will receive a Kiss the Cook print supplied as by Bonsai Trading. Sadly Bonsai Trading is no longer trading but John Pagan has kindly supplied me with a number of prints to give away.

* From: "Colin & Carol Baynes"
Last month I found a novel way to celebrate my 40th Birthday (not that I'm planning to celebrate it again) - instead of asking for presents, in a fit of imagination I decided to give away my 40 Discworld books to various family & friends. Each individually wrapped with a letter of explanation, and some to appropriate recipients (eg Making Money to an accountant, Soul Music to a bass player). It was a bit of a wrench to let go of my treasured accumulation of the last 15 years, but I had a good buzz about "spreading the word", in some cases to people who'd not read a single Pratchett. And I still have Nation, the Bromeliads and a few other prized works of literature!

In return, I invited gifts to the Alzheimer's Research Trust, as I felt it was appropriate to the theme, and the various cheques amounted to 260 GBP, which I have passed on today. All good fun and worthwhile. As I told my friends, I'm looking forward to sending them the next 40 books for my 80th birthday... always assuming they find a cure for Alzheimer's!

* From: "Bindu Nayar"

I ran across this fascinating article about the original Golem in the New York Times, which had me marvelling, yet again, at our Mr. Pratchett's vast range of knowledge. I thought I'd send this link along to you in case you run into another DWM reader who, like me, thought the Golem was of purely Discworld-ly origin.

* From: "Haggett, Sarah"
I am busy doing research on women in the Renaissance and the Reformation for my masters degree, and came across the following quote:

"Protestant Reformers generally saw female rule as inherently unnatural, unlawful, and contrary to Scripture, although they had to come to terms with female rulers who favoured the Reformation in their territories. The most notable of such tracts was that by John Knox, First Blast of the Trumpet against the Monstrous Regiment of Women (1558) against Mary, Queen of Scots, and Mary Tudor."

I just love it when Terry Pratchett adds a dimension of laughter to my research!

* From: "Roy Spearman"
I have noticed something that I feel is quite inexplicable and further proof of the Discworld's merging with what we jokingly call Realworld (or perhaps that should be Roundworld....).

Allow me to explain.

Over the winter months, when the weather is nice and cold, the drivers of white vans have displayed uncommon manners when driving, pulling out and parking using what I would describe as common sense and generally not being a danger to other road users.

Now that the weather has improved (I'm writing this with sun light streaming in through the buses window - I'm on my way home) I'm noticing that the drivers mannerisms and general performance are degrading rapidly.

As we all know white vans throughout the country are sponsored by that little known company Pratna, as in Pratna White Van (credit to Mr T Wogan, BBC Radio 2 for that one) but this observation has led me to the inevitable conclusion that Pratna are recruiting Trolls as drivers.

The logic is simple. We all know that as a Trolls brain cools, their mental agility and reasoning ability increases. Therefore it follows that a Troll driving a van in cold temperatures would be far superior in that role than during warm or at least temperate periods. This logic is obviously proven through my observation.

I can hardly wait till we see Black Ribboners working in our hospitals....perhaps as Phlebotomists?

DWM replies: Roy gets this month's Letter Of The Month. Please note I will really try to get the back log of the Kiss The Cook posters out this month.

* From: "Sapphire Cat"
Dreamworks is doing a Terry Pratchett Movie!!!!

Yes, yes, we all know what multiple exclamation marks mean - but I'm so excited(!!!!!!!) Finally - a Pratchett movie I can show my four year old son, and could this just be the beginning?

Don't get me wrong - I think the BBC attempts at taking Pratchett's imagination to the silver screen were a noteworthy effort and very nice (and all that), but frankly, only the more hardcore Pratchett fans appreciated the copy of Hogfather I showed them. Dreamworks, on the other hand.. I just can't see them getting this wrong (UNLESS they decide to completely ignore the story and use the title only in their movie). If this movie series is a success.. Who knows how far Discworld movies can go?

On another note - I have a friend who does not read (ever) but who decided he was going to try that teen vampire book Twilight. (Beyond me why.. I'm not tempted to touch that book with a bargepole). Apparently the library didn't have any copies of said book, and my friend felt it would be terribly rude to leave without getting at least one book out.. Thankfully he remembered how much I go on about this author "teri prachet" (his spelling).... well he got out "Moving Pictures".

By page 12 he was laughing out loud about something in a book for the first time in his life. By page 20, apparently he was struggling to breath from laughing. Now he's asking me about the next book I'd think he'd enjoy. I've suggested Carpe Jugulum - a Real Vampire story (where Vampires don't sparkle like diamonds but some of them pretend to dvink vine).

DWM replies: I think you will find that Hogfather and The Colour of Magic were made by Sky not the BBC.

* From: "Ray Daley"
Last month Liz Kearney asked why Vimes didn't visit his mother in the past.

Doesn't Vimes state as an aside in his mind that his mother was already dead as he talks about "up at Small Gods" which is the local cometary for the simple religions for poorer people. So Vimes knows Young Sam is making the offer out of politeness knowing his Superior will never take him up on a meeting Young Sam knows can never happen with an already dead mother.

* From: "Martin Barrett"
Re: Street names in towns.

I live in Gravesend in Kent and we have a Havelock road.... Maybe the Patrition himself came here once

* From: "Loretta H."
I read with interest Vikram Ramachandran's comments on 'Terry phasing out Granny Weatherwax'. I have honestly thought for quite a few years now that Terry is afraid of Granny. Sometimes characters do take over the story and don't let the author do what he wants. Granny would be capable of that, now wouldn't she?

4. DiscTrivia

This month I'm asking some questions about Guards! Guards!

Who is the supreme grand master?
What book was taken from the Library?
a) Dragons for Dummies
b) The Summoning of Dragons
c) Dragons Through The Ages
d) The Summoning and Controlling of Dragons
Who is Goodboy Bindle Featherstone better known as?
Who got sent out with Carrot to show him the ropes?
Where is Detritus employed during the events described in Guards! Guards!?

The results, as always, appear at the end of this issue.

5. Discworld Street Names

Last month many of you asked what Terry's short list was for names to be considered for the new housing estate in Wincanton. As you know Treacle Mine Road and Peach Pie Street were chosen.

The full list that Terry provided was:

Needless to say the Bernard, The Cunning Artificer, has produced fridge magnets with these names on them. They are selling for 2 GBP each 1 GBP of which goes to the charity RICE.

See next month's issue for a competition to win a complete set of the fridge magnets.

We've received quite a lot of mail about Discworld names appearing in the round world and it appears that most of them are a variation of LLAMEDOS or LLAMADOS. Based possibly more on Dylan Thomas's Under Milk Wood.

M Payne took on some research and writes:

Bob Shingler's discovery of a property called Llamados can readily be added to by a quick internet search. And a search for 'Llamedos' also produces a scattering of properties in GB and Ireland, a few holiday lets in Spain , e.g. Casa Llamedos, and even a B&B in Ypres. There are even 16 boats registered under the name Llamedos - the earliest constructed in 1972 - including one for holiday hire at Brighton Marina. Clearly the name is meant to have some enticement for the prospective holiday maker which I would suggest, with proper respect to its inhabitants, that the Discworld location lacks. Both spellings are perhaps more convincing as good Spanish than as bad Welsh. Once Dylan Thomas had been inspired to reverse 'bugger all' as a name for the town 'Under Milk Wood' it invited anyone who got the joke to try similar experiments and 'sod' em all' would perhaps be at the head of the printable list.

So it would be surprising in any event that Llamedos had not occured to anyone before appearing Soul Music in 1994. In fact Dylan Thomas had already used it himself, postumously, in 'Under St John's Wood', his contribution to 'A la Recherche du Cricket Perdu , An Anthology of New Writing' presented by Simon Barnes, published by Macmillan in 1989 (Thomas placed his dreaming cricketers in the Llamedos Hotel). Dylan Thomas was very dead at the time - he had passed on in 1953 - and could only contribute to this anthology through his medium Barnes. So his apparent priority may be explained as a rare case of clairvoyant plagiarism. I doubt that this could lead to any successful legal action.

6. Competition

This month we have a wonderful price to give away. To celebrate the Glorious 25th May PJSM Prints ( have come up with a new 1.5" collectable pin badge for the People's Republic of Treacle Mine Road.

PJSMPrints are making one prototype 2" pin available to each of the 3rd, 5th, 9th, 18th, 25th, 103rd, 105th, 109th or 118th purchaser of the pins, and they are also making the tenth available to us as a prize.

So, in order to be the winner of 1 of only 10 2" prototype pin badges, all you need to do is answer the following simple questions.

What flower is traditionally worn by Watchmen on the 25th May?
When do the badges go on general sale?
What badge is coming soon...?

Send your answers to by 20th June 2009 to enter the draw.

The randomly selected winner will be announced next month. We would like to thank the lovely people at for their support.

7. Article: My Experience Painting Discworld Miniatures

Written by Roy Ayres

I, too bought a set of the 30mm MicroArt figures based on Paul Kidby's designs and felt inspired enough to learn how to paint them. Little did I realise what I was letting myself in for. The figures are marvellously detailed and in order to do them justice I went in search of advice and equipment. My first stop was the oracle that is AFP, where several people were very helpful. Then I went to Games Workshop. I made a mistake and took my wallet with me .... I hadn't realised just what a big hobby miniature painting is! Anyway, once I had enough paints and brushes and a book, I set to work.

I bought eight figures and I'm mounting them in pairs - Rincewind and the Luggage; Sir Sam and Nobby; Death and Susan; and Granny and Nanny. For each pair I've made a little diorama so I can display them in some kind of context.

I've completed the first little diorama, of Rincewind and the Luggage in a Summoning Octogram and put some pictures online. Nowhere near professional standard but I'm fairly pleased with the results.

The album is at

For Death and Susan; and Granny and Nanny I now have to learn how to paint so the robes look black but have shading to enhance the drapes. Starling's wing time, possibly. Oh, and then I'll have to get the latest figures, which include Cohen. Varicose veins at 30mm scale could pose a challenge!

8. The End

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* Disc Trivia Results *

Who is the supreme grand master?
Lupine Wonse
What book was taken from the Library?
b) The Summoning of Dragons
Who is Goodboy Bindle Featherstone better known as?
Who got sent out with Carrot to show him the ropes?
Nobby Nobbs
Where is Detritus employed during the events described in Guards! Guards!?
In the broken drum as a splatter.

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