Discworld Monthly - Issue 285 - April 2021

↑≡1. Editorial

Welcome to issue 285. It's been an interesting time here at Discworld Monthly HQ - Llamedos On The Clacks took over our lives and our living space for nearly three months and is still protruding into our lives - though we have managed to get some of our living room back to some resemblance on normality.

As far as we were concerned Llamedos on the Clacks was a huge success and most of the virtual attendees appear to have really enjoyed themselves. It was a huge amount of hard work to produce and a lot more stressful than the live Llamedos Holiday Camp we ran in 2020. We've spoken to the Diplomat Hotel and are pleased to announce that, subject to COVID rules, Llamedos Holiday Camp 2022 will be an in-person event.

Sadly we've heard recently that COVID has forced the wonderful team at the Irish Discworld Convention to move their event over to online only. We respect their plans and will still be virtual guests at IDWCon 2021. The team promises an exciting weekend of fun activities and we look forward to seeing what they will achieve.

Rachel and I recently had our first COVID vaccination and we hope this means that soon we'll be able to see people again. Virtual cons are fun but it's not the same as relaxing in the bar with friends after the events of the day have finished.

Now that Llamedos is over for a while we plan to start running our monthly quizzes again. Our next quiz will be at the end of April. We'll publish information about the Spring Quiz via our social media channels once we work out the exact dates.

If you have something you'd like to chat with other fans about, why not send us a readers' letter, to info@discworldmonthly.co.uk

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Jason Rincewind Anthony-Rowlands (Editor and Wizzard) info@discworldmonthly.co.uk
Rachel Anthony-Rowlands (Don't forget to adopt a chimp for christmas at Wales Ape and Monkey Sanctuary ) rachel@discworldmonthly.co.uk
Richard Massey (President of Pencil Shavings and hole punch holes in the UK)

If you want to make a small, purely optional, financial donation to the upkeep of the newsletter please use our Paypal account info@discworldmonthly.co.uk

We'd like to thank all those that have already helped, you really do make a difference.

↑≡1.1 Important Information

We have several places where you can get up to the minute news and information about all things Discworld from Discworld Monthly.

Facebook: Discworld Monthly Facebook Page

Twitter: @dwmoook

Instagram: Discworld Monthly on Instagram

And our website, discworldmonthly.co.uk which contains loads of information about the books, stage productions around the world, interesting articles, back issues and our merchandise shop.

↑≡1.2 Submissions

Want to make your opinions about the Discworld known to the world?

Have you been to see a play or a Discworld related event and want to write a review about it?

Then get writing! We are always on the lookout for exclusive articles and reviews to share with our readers so don't hesitate, email us today with the subject Article/Review at rachel@discworldmonthly.co.uk

If you are putting on a stage production or know of a stage production near you, please email us and let us know about that too.

We happily advertise all stage productions for free and we can help in other ways too. Email rachel@discworldmonthly.co.uk with the Subject line "Stage Production".

The deadline for submissions to issue 286 of Discworld Monthly is the 5th May 2021.

↑≡1.3 Merchandise

We're past the posting date for Hogswatch sorry... Also our mug printer has become rather poorly of late and has been put out to pastures new [or the dump - Ed] so we are currently unable to produce mugs until we can source a replacement.

Discworld Monthly has an amazing (if we say so ourselves) range of badges , fridge magnets , keyrings , and window stickers for sales worldwide.

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↑≡2. News

2.1 50th Anniversary Edition of The Carpet People

To celebrate half a century since its original release, David Tennant is set to narrate The Carpet People for a new audiobook.

Due to be published on 22nd April on both CD and download.

You can hear a short sample of the audio book at facebook.com

View our affiliate links to order Carpet People Audiobook

Also released on the 22nd April is a new paperback edition of The Carpet People - This is the same text as the 1992 edition not the original 1971 text. The Australian and New Zealand publishers have already provided information on their websites but the UK published appears to be holding back..

Links to the 50th Anniversary Paperback coming soon.

↑≡2.2 The Watch Series in more Regions

The Watch is now available to watch in the following regions:

• USA - BBC America
• Australia - Stan
• China - Bilibili
• Greece - Cosmote TV
• Hong Kong - BBC First
• Israel - Yes
• Malaysia - BBC First, BBC Player
• New Zealand - TVNZ
• Russia and CIS - Kinopoisk, Viasat World
• Singapore - BBC First, BBC Player
• Sub-Saharan Africa - M-Net
• Spain - Telefonica
• Taiwan - BBC First
• In flight - Emirates

Still no news for the UK.

↑≡2.3 Australian Discworld Convention News

The Lost Con

As you all know (1) we have postponed the Australian Discworld Convention until 8th - 10th April 2022. However, we plan to celebrate the original dates with a virtual event on Saturday 3rd July 2021, tentatively from 6pm to 12am AEDT (Sydney time) . This will be a chance for us all to catch up and have some fun. This will be open to all convention members, attending and supporting.

We are thinking of:

- A fiendish (2) Discworld quiz

- A costume event

- A radio play

- Maybe a couple of special guests for a virtual Klatch

-And perhaps a visit to the Ankh Morpork palace dungeon? It's easy to enter, not so easy to escape (3)

-And a bedtime story to finish

ausdwcon.org

(1) Because we have done our best to let you know - although if you live far away the Pointless Albatross may not have arrived yet.

(2) Fiends not guaranteed - unless they escape from the Dungeon Dimensions again.

(3) As I have said before, "never build a dungeon that you would not be happy to be thrown in yourself."

↑≡2.4 Update from the Irish Discworld Convention 2021

It's been a tough 12 months for everyone, and this is one announcement we hoped we wouldn't have to make, but we're sure many of you might have suspected it would be a possibility...

After a lot of discussions, research and deliberation we have decided that the Irish Discworld Convention 2021 will be held fully online.

We know this will be very disappointing for many of you, and we wish to ensure you that we did not come to this decision lightly. There are a number of factors that we have been considering very carefully for many months now, but it comes down to a few important details:

• Safety: Although the vaccines are being rolled out very efficiently in some places like the UK, this is not the case here in Ireland. Vaccinations are happening frustratingly slowly. Furthermore, we are still not clear on the long-term efficiency for those at high-risk or against new strains. A Con that is not safe to attend is not an option.
• Your pocket: If we go ahead and then have to cancel at short notice, we know that we cannot offer any refunds or help you out with travel/accommodation costs. This doesn't seem fair.
• Our pocket: We have been handed the reigns of IDWCon and we take this honour very seriously. We must ensure the financial security and longevity of the convention so that we can meet up when it is safe to do so.
• We're not sure if you can get here: Cork airport recently announced they will close the airport for 2 weeks in the Autumn but have not stated when. Seriously - we think we have angered the gods!!!!!

Our hand has been forced - but luckily we are quite prepared for this!! Please do not fret. We have excellent, sneaky and extravagant plans to bring you THE most fun, exciting and entertaining online Irish Discworld Convention you can possibly imagine. We have spent many hours over the last 3 months researching to find the perfect online platform that will allow us to maintain the friendly and social heart of IDWCon. We are actually quite excited about the possibilities and avenues that this will open up for us. We have a whole new set of ideas as to how the games will be played and the songs will be sung - so please do not despair!

We know many of you will find this upsetting, and we wish this didn't have to be the case - but at the end of the day - you folk are just too important to risk.

Irish Discworld Convention

↑≡2.5 Llamedos on the Clacks News

Now that the dust has settled we are very proud to announce that through ticket sales / merchandise and our Be More Nanny scheme we were able to give an amazing 2288 GBP to Wales Ape and Monkey Sanctuary and 1144 GBP to R.I.C.E Bath

We'd like to thank all our supporters for making this happen at a particularly hard time for animal sanctuaries which can't get government funding and can't raise funds through ticket sales. Hopefully when COVID restrictions are lifted we'll all be able to visit this amazing facility that provides forever homes to abused or abandoned animals.

Dragon Trials - Coming 2022:

Don't forget to keep an eye on the Llamedos Holiday Camp website for exciting news about our next event Llamedos Holiday Camp 2022: Dragon Trials - March 4th - 6th 2022.

LLamedos Holiday Camp 2022: Dragon Trials

↑≡2.6 Book Releases 2021

Publishing dates have been screwed around by COVID-19, but if you have already pre-ordered, your order should still stand.

We now have a few new affiliates in our programme so you have more choice as to where to buy things from. We gained Book Depository, Blackwells and Forbidden Planet in the last couple of months.

If you want to buy Discworld books, but don't want to use Amazon within the UK, we now have an affiliate bookshop at uk.bookshop.org

Bookshop.org helps independent bookshops all over the UK when you purchase from them. We are currently populating our shopfront there with all of Terry's books, a portion of the profits go to independent bookshops in the UK. - If we don't have a book you want in our store front, just ask and I'll pop it in there for you!

Due for publication in March 2021

The latest three playscripts adapted by Stephen Briggs finally have a release date.

Hogfather, Lords and Ladies and The Shakespeare Codex will make their way to book shops on 11th March 2021.

Priced at 10.99 GBP each, currently they are only available to pre-order at Waterstones uk although we are sure that will change shortly.

They will come out as an omnibus later in the year under the name "All the Discworld's a Stage - Volume Two"

Hogfather Playscript by Stephen Briggs

View our affiliate links to order Hogfather adapted by Stephen Briggs Play Script

The Shakespeare Codex Playscript by Stephen Briggs

View our affiliate links to order The Shakespeare Codex adapted by Stephen Briggs Play Script

Lords and Ladies Playscript by Stephen Briggs

View our affiliate links to order Lords and Ladies adapted by Stephen Briggs Play Script

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Due for publication in April 2021

A new collection of short stories by various authors will be published by Puffin books.

The Puffin Book of Funny Stories has stories and extracts from best-loved classic authors Joan Aiken, Terry Pratchett, Dick King-Smith, Rebecca Elliott, Humza Arshad, Henry White, Julian Clary, Sam Copeland and other contemporary writers.

ISBN-13: 978-0241434734

Price 7.99GBP in the UK in paperback, 3.99GBP on kindle

View our affiliate links to order Puffin Book of Funny Stories

And just in case you didn't get it for Christmas,

Illustrated Guards! Guards!

With each of the editions containing 10 full page colour illustrations and series of pencil drawings, these editions of Guards! Guards! follow the format of the illustrated Good Omens that were released last year.

View our affiliate links to order Illustrated Guards! Guards! - Standard Edition

View our affiliate links to order Illustrated Guards! Guards! - Slipcase Edition

The Dunmanifestin edition will be published 25th March 2021 at a cost of 195GBP and they are a limited edition of just 1000 copies.

Currently you can pre-order a copy from shop.paulkidby.com

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↑≡3. DiscTrivia

This month I've included some questions previously asked in one of our online quizzes. Good luck!

Q1.	What colour are the inexpertly sewn on letters on Rincewind's hat?
Q2.	When Detritus gets embarrassed what colour does he blush?
Q3.	Roughly how many Rhinu did Twoflower bring with him to Ankh-Morpork? a) 200, b) 400, c) 2000 or d) 4000
Q4.	What is the name of the Farmer in Mr Bunnsy Has an Adventure? a) Cully, b) Jones, c) Fred, d) Dorcon
Q5.	In which road in Ankh-Morpork would you find "The Bunch of Grapes" pub?

The answers as usual can be found at the end of this issue.

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↑≡4. Birthdays

Everyone has a birthday. If you know someone who would like a mention or if you would like your birthday included in the listings, send us an email the month before your birthday and we will add it to the list! Email rachel@discworldmonthly.co.uk Subject: Birthday

Happy April Birthday wishes to: Mark Dissington, Anne Mackenzie, Dmitriy AK Ark, Marcin Jaworowicz, Jan Uzzell, Alan Jakubus-Hughes, James May, Amber "Nudge" Grundy, Amy Kingston Anderson, Mandy Eldred-Tyler, Howard Legg, Grace Koscielna, Sue Gill, Pamela Keenan, Sephie James, Roger Hathaway, Pam Martin, Discworld Artist Stephen Player, Hanna Stewart, Chico Kidd, Louise Richardson, Chris Petticrew, Reb at The Discworld Emporium, Michelle Stevens, Kathryn Jones, Andrew Malloy, Su Eriksson, Elizabeth Lamming, Bill Barnett and, of course, to Sir Terry Pratchett who should have been 73.

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↑≡5. Readers' Letters

If you have any letters or comments, please email them to info@discworldmonthly.co.uk

We assume any correspondence is eligible for use in the newsletter unless otherwise stated, including the sender's email address. We may edit your letters for the sole purpose of having something new to write here.

It is vitally important that you don't pass off other people's work as your own. If you use information from other resources please let us know so we can give proper credit.

We make an editorial decision on what letters to include. Sometimes the opinions expressed in a letter are not the same as our own but we reserve the right to publish them nevertheless. You might not like the content of the letters we publish and we encourage you to write in your own constructive letters explaining your points of view. We will not shy away from you including letters that question our views and expect our readers to be able to accept that not everyone has the same point of view on all subjects.

Please bear in mind that the Discworld Universe does NOT include The Watch TV series and thus if we read deeply between the lines, it looks like we will only get the one season of it anyway whether you love it or hate it - Rachel

* From: "Dave Hough" davehough831@yahoo.co.uk

I have asked The Discworld Emporium before and they said it would be too expensive, but here's my idea:

We all love the Discworld Stamps

Every Stamp Collector I know as a Stamp Album

Have Discworld Stamps and a Stamp Album (s) Answer No, and why not?

I have loads of discworld stamps, haven't a clue what date they came out all stuck in a draw.

So please can we have some sort of Discworld Stamp Album and let's say a Catalogue of all the stamps issued so far etc etc.

What a great idea! ------- or do i hear moans and groans in the background,

If we can have about a thousand versions of Good Omens then surely a lovely Discworld Stamp Album to display our stamps.

Dave Hough from Bristol.

Jason replies: Not sure about the Album but there is a very good website run by Steve James that lists all the stamps, their release dates and variations etc.

discworldstampcatalogue.co.uk

*From: "Chris Swinton" chrisswinton1985@hotmail.com

I have by way of the internet equivalent of CMOT Dibbler, seen a couple of episodes of "The Watch".

I cannot bring myself to endure any more of it, and yet part of me feels I should view it all. I don't really want to give up any more of my time to it after what I've seen so far.

If it was a programme with totally different named characters who bore almost no resemblance to the crafted characters within Sir Terry's works, then it might be more watchable. Instead, I found myself getting more and more annoyed with what I was presented with.

I could expand but I wouldn't want to spoil (if that's the right word when referring to this)

anything if anyone is willing to put themselves through it.

When I saw the cast and who they were playing I was skeptical, but also hopeful that some people - Richard Dormer for example - could have been the perfect casting.

The final straw for me was The Librarian. I thought to myself that if they can't even manage to use a CGI Organutan or even a decent costume, then why bother?

So what to do? Watch the rest of it and give up my time to this frankly insulting interpretation of one of satirical literatures' greatest minds?

Or shall I stay where I am, secure in the knowledge that it's absolute pap, and further episodes are unlikely to change my mind.

I don't like leaving things unfinished, but I really don't see why I should watch any further when it's already disappointed me so spectacularly.

* From: "Red Green" rescue22001@yahoo.com

I was sad to hear we lost Larry Hart. I could tell you are hurting. God bless you as you continue your work, and I also promise to stay safe and cautious for me and for others. Thank you again for continuing to give so much time and effort to keep the Discworld Monthly going.

Sincerely, Panda Englerth, Hastings Michigan USA

Jason replies: Thank you Panda, We can hope that with the current uptake of the vaccinations that life can return to some level of normal within the foreseeable future. Life will never be the same again - we can't get back those that we have lost. We should feel blessed that we have lost so few friends and Discworld fans during these interesting times. Stay safe and hang on for a bit longer.

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↑≡6. Review: The Watch TV Series

The person who wrote these reviews, having seen the way people have been treated for expressing an opinion wishes to remain uncredited. In their notes to us they said: I wrote the review for each episode as I watched it. I tried to be objective. I hope you can make some sense of it all, but I just could not bring myself to edit it further myself.

If you feel the reviews are unfair - we will be happy to accept your review for publication in a future issue provided it is well researched and fair as we feel this one is.

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BBC America's The Watch - Episode 1

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Well, as a Terry Pratchett fan I was greatly insulted by the view of this, his pet Television project, started way back before he died, afforded me by seeing the trailers on YouTube. They were to put it mildly terrible. Like watching a train wreck. I swore I'd not watch this series... but then I am a stickler for punishment.

Having nothing better to do on New Years day, I found a copy Amazon had released and watched it. To say it was actually terrible was an understatement. The whole had little if anything to do with PTerry's actual works, except to borrow a bit of plot from the books Guards! Guards! and Nightwatch.

Firstly they have so changed the characters and technology of the Discworld as to make them barely recognizable, and have added history and personal plots that were never in any of the books, and are frankly bad writing at its best. So having decided that I might try watching the rest of it as if it had nothing to do with PTerry's works at all, I sat and watched what was, is, and probably always will be a terrible train wreck, misnomer of a series. I point out here that I have only seen the first episode, at this point.

So to start, the quality of the filmmaking is slapdash at best. The editing and exposition was choppy and disjointed, and left me confused at the best of times what was supposed to be happening. It seemed to be being played as if it was a pantomime and not as an actual television series. Given the limited budget (and I assume this one was infinitesimally small, because I'd hate to think this episode was crafted out of a big budget) the effects were interesting, not as bad as some I have seen, and the sets, well they varied from bombed out wasteland to modern urban squalor, kind of what a twenty year old mall looks like here after all the good business' have moved on and the squatters have moved in. Picture lots of Graffiti (inexplicably in phosphorescent neon colours) and mud and garbage. Not well dressed sets so much as trashed ones.

I did like how Detritus looked and moved. They at least got that right. The rest was terrible. Lines were mumbled and made little sense, and the acting was humdrum at best. Richard Dormer at least tried, but I suspect even he had an inkling that this stuff was shite. There was a lot of bad casting going on, and even the throw-away comment about Cheery's height was so stupid and no excuse for not hiring someone of approriate height, especially given that most actors in the Hollywoodland (on either side of the pond) are almost all short people. The actress, Marama Corlett, was the shortest member of the cast, and frankly would have made a better dwarf than the werewolf Angua (also why was she being locked up when she changed? Possibly that again was budget constrictions, they probably could not afford a furry suit and make-up that other genre shows manage with such ease.)

Adam Hugill in interviews gave the impression that he had at least read the source material, but over all, his Carrot Ironfounderson was needlessly aggressive and lacking in the simple confidence so evident in the character right from the start in the books.

I cannot say much about anything else, as that was also so poorly written and portrayed that I feel it unnecessary to expound upon each weak performance.

Does this series have any potential at all? Well you might ask, but the answer will be... NO! Not even in the slightest. As a punk series, it was not exciting enough to grab anyone's attention. As fantasy, well there was some fancy SFX of a fantasy city, and Detritus was well done, but nothing that the cheapest cell phone game could not outdo. As a Pratchett adaptation, well there it totally failed. The only interesting thing in the score was an instrumental rendition of The Bangles song "Walk Like An Egyptian" as the series theme... which in itself defies explanation for its inclusion.

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BBC America's The Watch - Episode 2

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The second episode brings me to the conclusion that this series is a nightmarish reversal of everything that was in the great Terry Pratchett's brilliant books. Very nearly every single idea borrowed from the books is the opposite of the original concept. Inexplicably they seem now to have electricity, albeit magic driven, by the Archanceller of Unseen University, which powers many things including microphones for singers who cannot sing. I do not recollect the Archanceller's name being mentioned, but must assume it to be Ridcully, although the supposed powers he has, would place him more as Albert Mallick, or possibly at the utmost maybe is a combination of all three known established Archancellers in the books.

The Librarian looked nothing like an orangutan, although there was a hominid look to his features and appearance, but nothing like the friendly affable Wobblehat we know. The Library itself was interesting, although the whole was not really seen. The reading room was an interesting development though, one I strangely approve of, as it would explain the ability of many wizards being able to read lost and dead languages without first learning them, although this takes away from many of Terry Pratchett's educated men ideas, and makes them nothing more than normal people using a shortcut to magic and learning.

The music this time was different, and I am to conclude that the series does not actually have a decisive theme tune, but many different pieces, no doubt aimed at a salable album down the line. It does seem to me that many decisions made on this series have a commercial aspect, be it one of a low budget (getting rid of the one character who cost money to have on screen as a CGI) and of course the aspect of possible merchandise.

The politic casting is getting worse by the episode too.

I still do not like the series, Loathe and hate it in fact, and am finding it harder and harder to watch. Even the train wreck idea is dissipating. It is becoming more pedestrian by the episode. Standard Hollywoodland rubbish. B movie fare, at a slapdash - I would say amateur quality, but having seen what amateurs can do on a budget on YouTube, I would put this as lower than amateur.

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BBC America's The Watch - Episode 3

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A slightly more constructed episode, which still fell short on most levels. Inexplicably the Watch all join the Musicians Guild, and we also get exposition on this version of Sybil Ramkin's past and current state. Also some badly mauled lyrics to a certain song from Terry Pratchett's novel Nightwatch.

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BBC America's The Watch - Episode 4

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Oh ho, the first thing I noticed about this episode that made me sit up and take notice was the title... "Twilight Canyons". Only a die hard fan of Terry Pratchett would know that name, the name of one of his unfinished Discworld books about the adventures of some aged pensioners who go on an adventure despite their failing health and dementia.

And I have to say that this episode did indeed have more of PTerry in it than any episode so far. In fact it was pretty obvious that whomever wrote the script was an actual fan of PTerry and had read the books. Certain speeches and situations were almost pure PTerry. Now this made this episode of interest. It makes me think that there could be some hope for this series after all... well actually probably not, but you never know.

Story wise there was more content and less nonsense than previous episodes to date. Finally we are getting to the meat and bones of the story. The actors performances were less confused and more focused, although there were one or two or more severe lapses.

I think that if the series carries on in this vein it may just have a small chance. But I have to wonder if that is a good thing or a bad thing?!? Really does any true fan want this series to continue, or do they want it to end so we can hopefully get back to the original intent of Narrativia and Terry Pratchett? I cannot say much for anyone else, but I admit for the first time I am a tiny bit unsure.

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BBC America's The Watch - Episode 5

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Ok I was wrong. The quality of this episode went right back down to the insipid quality of the first episode, including confused plotting and poor direction and acting. We get treated to Sonny Crocket's theme as Vimes strolls across the Namib and then falls flat on his face... just like this series is doing. Also now we are being given some hints of elements from Thud.

It's just so baaad! How can they assume we PTerry fans are so stupid as to like any of this rubbish? I am trying to be fair and review it as fairly as possible, but frankly it is crap and trash stewed in puerile bad taste.

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BBC America's The Watch - Episode 6

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Gawd help us... this episode even had a musical montage...

All Dwarves apparently are quite tall on this fantasy world. Here we had a little of Fifth Elephant and a whole lot of nothing to do with Terry Pratchett's books at all. This series is just so all over

the place, it is hard keeping track of what is going on at the best of times, and that is without trying to recognize any actual elements from our favourite esteemed author's works.

It all just does not make much sense what they are trying to achieve. Sometimes I think they are trying for funny, but falling way short, sometimes for drama and pathos, and yes falling even shorter. This is like a chaos pattern in film form.

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BBC America's The Watch - Episode 7

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Nope Nope NOPE!!! DEATH doing a musical number...

Who bloody writes this shite. Nothing in this episode was anything at all to do with Pratchett this time. But at least the "Plot" moved forward a bit, and I find myself hoping the villain wins and destroys the whole world. That would be nice. Then I could stop watching this and sitting there shaking my head and moaning softly "Why?" as the action plays out.

Exposition was a bit better this episode, but the reasoning escapes me. I've read & watched many things over the years that cover almost every aspect of insane, mad and just bloody stupid, but never all at once. The concept of this show it seems is total chaos with just some hints of plot and characterization. Clearly they were channeling Twilight Zone this time, and had a plot line (again I reiterate that the reasons for the story-line escape me) that was kind

of interesting, if it had not been so badly filmed and executed, and led to the villain achieving most of his goals. They obviously spent a little bit more money on this episode, even if they go to great lengths to misunderstand the characters and their own plotting.

Detritus was again present, and was quite well played, although the mask and make-up was a little obvious and slightly shabby, although the Body suit was pretty good... meaning of course that the realization of Detritus is actually a man in a suit instead of what I would have considered a character for SFX.

Actually I have been considering the concept of modern monsters versus old time monsters on TV (and even in movies) and I am often confused how simple some of the ideas and concepts are. Cosplayers achieve similar results as the professionals, and sometimes better results in a real world setting. If you look at a Television series from say the seventies, let's take a Doctor Who story as an example, specifically 'The Dinosaur Invasion' since that is what I watched over the weekend, and here you have a cheaply made show (BBC Budgets were - and probably still are - notoriously bad) . You had the dinosaurs as model effects and they were optically composited into the scenes. The usual problems with that technology show, but some were alright, some were just terrible. There was no convincing movement or action at all especially from the Big Bad, the Tyrannosaurus Rex. Now if you consider the idea of perhaps substituting the models for a man in a suit, this had been done reasonably cheaply by many productions including films like Godzilla, made way before the production of Doctor Who in the seventies, yet they opted for the horrible effects of an unconvincing model. Now you compare that suit idea to today's man in a suit ideas and you can see that with just a little bit of thought the impossible can actually look real, and a practical dinosaur can be made and actioned and then dropped into the scene.

Arguably the technology had come on by leaps and bounds, but I argue that in practical effects terms the materials are still much the same, just the ideas are better thought out. Puppetry mixed with suits are made more agile and visually convincing even in person, and I just do not know why they were not done all those years ago. Even Georges Melies had effects in his films that were better.

Now you compare the concept they are using for Detritus in 'The Watch' with say the CGI used in Snowgum Films 'Troll Bridge', and you can see that often the practical effect works better than the more expensive digital CGI. At least they seem to have got that right in this series. What baffles me though is if they went to all the effort to make the suit, why write the character out in the opening act of the series (even if they brought him back in a Chewbacca way (see 'Solo: A Star Wars Story' for that reference) . The pity is that the mask effect in close-up made the character so obvious that it was a man in a suit. Look at the job done on the series WandaVision of the almost seamless mask that Paul Bettany wears as Vision, and you can

see that Detritus'face was mostly visible through the prosthetic and thus you could see where the suit ended and flesh began. Pity that. It would otherwise be one of the few highlights of the series. Still Detritus is one of the best realized characters on the show, even if his looks differ from the artistic interpretations of him that have been done over the years.

But Death... not good.

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BBC America's The Watch - Episode 8

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Finally coming to an agonizing end. How this series has lagged on and on. Some of the actors tried to make the best of it, but I have to wonder if any of them knew what a monumental disaster this whole thing was going to be when they read the scripts. Did they indeed know what they were signing on for?

Finally I also wonder what PTerry would have made of this. Was this truly what he'd have wanted for his legacy. I doubt it. But if he had been still with us I suspect he would have just laughed it off as nonsense and fun, and not the serious work of art we were all originally hoping for.

Was it ever meant to be an adaptation of the Guards books? No, I do not think so. It was supposed to incorporate elements of the story's and maybe even follow them on occasion (especially in the first episodes which should have just been an adaptation of Guards! Guards!) ,

but I think it was always intended to be its own thing, just not this horrible or different. What were the makers thinking? Why on Earth did they even consider just blowing off all that the author had set up and envisioned, and making perhaps the worst TV I have seen in a long time (and mind I council this with the provisor that I mostly avoid quite a lot of the rubbish that comes out these days) . This could have been the very essence of a really decent ground breaking series, and instead they became churlish and childish and created a new form of garbage.

Pratchett aside, was there any redeeming aspect of this series? Perhaps some of the performers did put in a good day's work for their pay, Richard Dormer certainly did an incredible job playing an awfully written set of scripts, and had this been done as a strait Pratchett

work probably would have put in a performance of a lifetime. Samuel Adewunmi (Carcer Dun) also did his best with a terrible plot, and probably would have been happier with things done right too. In fact most of the cast tried to make the best of a terrible idea (or drug induced nightmare, depending on the views of those watching) . The sets were terrible and the production quality was mostly cheap and haphazard. Not so much a Fantasy series and a false fantasy by the perpetrators of this crime of a series. There were occasional small ideas that worked and too many that didn't. Overall it was a mess and will probably either go on to another unsatisfying season, because they do seem to be that deluded, or it will be justifiably cancelled and hopefully forgotten about to make way for the job done right.

Guess which one the stupid sods will pick? (they did for Star Trek, so why not for pseudo-Pratchett)

I won't be watching any follow up. I'll watch my DVDs of Hogfather, Colour Of Magic, and Going Postal, and wonder why they just didn't carry on making decent adaptations of damn good books.

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↑≡7. Stage Productions

Of course, most if not all of the productions that would normally appear here have been cancelled or postponed due to COVID-19. We really hope that once the current situation has resolved itself the productions will be rescheduled and we can get our regular dose of Pratchett performances.

Whilst we would love to get to every event and play to write reviews and articles about them, we just don't have enough time, petrol and a wide enough spread of friends to borrow the couch for the night. But you, our wonderful readers do have the time, petrol and often don't need the couches as the event or play is on your doorstep!

We don't have English degrees here and you don't need one either to write something for Discworld Monthly!

PS. If you know of a play or event that we don't know about (shock horror) , email us. We like the surprise!

All submissions should be emailed to rachel@discworldmonthly.co.uk or info@discworldmonthly.co.uk

Don't forget to visit Pratchett Stage Productions for our most up-to-date list of stage productions.

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↑≡8. Discworld Conventions and other Events

8.1 New and Updated Events

These events are new or have recently been updated. For our full list visit: Conventions and Other Events

[Updated: Germany] German Discworld Convention 2021 (online event)

Location:	Burg Ludwigstein, 37214 Witzenhausen, Germany
Dates:	8th May 2021 - 9th May 2021
Tickets:	tba
Website:	scheibenwelt-convention.de

The Theme for the Convention will be Genoa

[Updated: Australia] Nullus Anxietas 7a - The Lost Con (Virtual Event)

Location:	Sydney
Dates:	Saturday 3rd July 2021
Tickets:	See Website for details.
Website:	ausdwcon.org

[Updated: Ireland] Irish Discworld Convention 2021 (Now a virtual event)

Location:	Cork International Hotel, Cork Airport Business Park, Cork, County Cork, Ireland. T12 H516
Dates:	8th October - 11th October 2021
Tickets:	tba
Website:	2021.idwcon.org

The Irish Discworld Convention will return in 2021.

[Updated: UK] Llamedos Holiday Camp 2022 - Dragon Trials

Location:	Llanelli, South Wales, UK
Dates:	4th March 2022 - 6th March 2022
Tickets:	tba
Website:	llamedosholidaycamp.com

Schmae Campers, We'll be back in 2022 for all your Camp Needs, Rwby and the purple coats

[Updated: Australia] Nullus Anxietas 7a - The Australian Discworld Convention

Location:	Sydney, Australia
Dates:	8th April 2022 - 10th April 2022
Tickets:	See Website for details.
Website:	2022.ausdwcon.org

Due to the current situation with the COVID-19 pandemic, we have made the decision to postpone the convention from its original dates.

[Updated: UK] International Discworld Convention 2022 (Rescheduled from 2020)

Location:	Birmingham Hilton Metropole Hotel, The NEC Birmingham, Pendigo Way, Marston Green, Birmingham B40 1PP
Dates:	Friday 19 August 2022- Monday 22 August 2022
Tickets:	See Website for details.
Website:	2020.dwcon.org

Something Wicked This Way Comes...

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↑≡9. Recurring Fan Meetings

By their very nature the listing of recurring fan meetings remains static. So we've moved the full listings to our website at Recurring Fan Meetings

The newsletter will only include any listings that are new or have changed within the last 30 days.

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↑≡10. Small Ads

If you want to try to sell your unwanted / duplicate Discworld items to other fans (and its legal for you to do so) email us at info@discworldmonthly.co.uk with the subject "Ads" and a short description of what you have and how fans can contact you. Discworld Monthly only lists the ads and is not responsible for the contents, validity or reliability of the ads or the buyers and sellers.

Bob Taylor r898taylor@btinternet.com writes: Having been a Discworld collector since the early 1990's I have amassed quite a collection. My 82 birthday is approaching and with nobody to leave them to. If you can help me dispose of some or all my pieces I would be grateful. I am not looking to make a profit., just a fair price. The collection consists of most of Bernard's work (figures and some larger pieces) . I am not very adept on the computer, so if anyone is interested I can post a hard copy with a full list of what is available. All pieces are from a smoke free house in display cabinets.

Keith Kenny keith.e.kenny@gmail.com writes: I have quite a few Discworld items for sale, including the following:

• The Truth Book Proof - signed but not dedicated, small fold on front top corner
• The Science of Discworld Uncorrected Bound Proof - excellent condition
• US First Edition of Carpe Jugulum - signed and dedicated, excellent condition
• US First Edition of Small Gods - signed and dedicated, excellent condition
• US First Edition of Jingo - signed and dedicated, excellent condition
• US First Edition of Maskerade - signed and dedicated, excellent condition
• 22 editions of Discworld Collectors Newsletter (from Clarecraft) from Feb 1995 to Aug 2001, not complete set
• 27 editions of Ramtop To Rimfall - Guild of Fans and Disciples Newsletter - from July 1995 to July 2003 to, not complete set
• 5 editions of The Wizards Knob magazine, issues 7, 8, 10, 11, 13 and 14
• SFX "The Authorised Terry Pratchett's Discworld Magazine" from 1997 (poster not included)
• 3 x Clarecraft promotional postcard (2 the same)
• Discworld 1 game promotional postcard
• Discwolrd 2 game promotional postcard
• Set of 4 Witches postcard
• Set of 3 Discworld greetings card (Death, The Witches and The Librarian)
• 2 x Soul Cake Tuesday Duck postcard
• 2 x .303 Bookworm postcard
• Truckers VHS
• Wyrd Sisters Special Boxed Edition VHS
• 4 x Soul Music VHS (3 x Part 1, 1 x Part 2 to form an image of Death when all 4 put together, was a struggle to find all the different editions to form this image!)
• 3 x Wyrd Sisters VHS promotional postcard
• Set of 6 Soul Music VHS promotional postcard

There may be a few other oddities lying around, please email if you are interested in any of these items and we can discuss price etc. I can of course supply pictures if you want.

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↑≡11. The End

This month's issue is brought to you by percussion instruments, clacks and chocolate eggs.

The deadline for submissions to issue 286 of Discworld Monthly is the 5th May 2021.

↑≡11.1 Supporting Discworld Monthly

Discworld Monthly was created as a totally free newsletter and will continue to remain so for as long as it continues. However, the costs of maintaining the website, postage, travel etc. add up. If you feel you would like to make a small contribution towards these costs please consider doing so via: PayPal

Our account for Paypal is info@discworldmonthly.co.uk

You can also purchase items from our range of licensed Discworld Monthly products from: Discworld Monthly Shop

↑≡11.2 eBook Editions

Since issue 166 we have produced a version of Discworld Monthly that is formatted better for the Amazon Kindle eBook reader and since issue 186 we also produce an ePub version for other eBook readers such as the Kobo, Nook and Sony readers.

You can download either version from Discworld Monthly eBooks

Please do let us know if you use them!

↑≡11.3 Contact Information

We prefer information to be sent via email info@discworldmonthly.co.uk or rachel@discworldmonthly.co.uk but can also accept information via post at the following addresses: Discworld Monthly, 20 Cambrian Place, Pontarddulais, Swansea, SA4 8RG, United Kingdom

↑≡11.4 Latest Book Information

There is a list of books on our website with the cover blurb and direct links to UK, US and Canadian Amazon websites.

Terry Pratchett books at Discworld Monthly

You can also find a list of our affiliates at:

Discworld Monthly Affiliate Links

We have an extensive Terry Pratchett biography with a tick list you can print out at:

Terry Pratchett Biography

↑≡11.5 Subscription Information

To subscribe to Discworld Monthly simply enter your email address in the form on the Discworld Monthly web page. Our web site contains all back issues and links to other Pratchett sites.

discworldmonthly.co.uk

To unsubscribe please follow the instructions at the end of this email.

↑≡11.6 Trivia Answers

Q1.	What colour are the inexpertly sewn on letters on Rincewind's hat?
A1.	Silver (Sourcery)
Q2.	When Detritus gets embarrassed what colour does he blush?
A2.	Detritus blushed the colour of fresh-cut garnet. (Moving Pictures)
Q3.	Roughly how many Rhinu did Twoflower bring with him to Ankh-Morpork? a) 200, b) 400, c) 2000 or d) 4000
A3.	c) 2000 (The Colour of Magic)
Q4.	What is the name of the Farmer in Mr Bunnsy Has an Adventure? a) Cully, b) Jones, c) Fred, d) Dorcon
A4.	c) Farmer Fred (The Amazing Maurice and His Educated Rodents)
Q5.	In which road in Ankh-Morpork would you find "The Bunch of Grapes" pub?
A5.	Easy Street (Guards! Guards!)

11.7 Small Print

We make every effort we can to ensure the information in this newsletter is accurate and legal. All trademarks are recognized as the property of their respective owners, whoever they may be. Discworld (R) is a registered trademark of the Estate of Sir Terry Pratchett used under licence.

↑≡11.8 Thanks

Thanks for reading this issue of 'Discworld Monthly'. We hope you enjoyed it. If you have any comments, complaints or suggestions for the future of this newsletter please email the editor : info@discworldmonthly.co.uk

Thank you Terry Pratchett

↑≡11.9 The Final Word...

*Rachel here*

We may not be perfect designers, or award winning journalists but we do our best to keep you all entertained and informed about all things Terry. We do have some ethics though. We like our news to be current, up to date and factual with a solid source. We don't like posting rumours but occasionally the source it comes from is 98 percent solid so we will tell you it's a rumour and confirm it when we have a 100 percent confirmation. Our own articles are written by us for us only. You won't find articles from other publications here unless it's a formal press release about an adaptation, book release or event or something we actually wrote for someone else unless they begged us to publish it (OK not begged but some of our lovely friends do ask us occasionally to boost something) . [NB I say we are not award winning but Discworld Monthly did win Website of the Month for Issue 3 back in a different century. It would be nice to win something much more recent, or even just get acknowledged #justsaying]

Whilst you keep reading it, we'll keep on writing it because we love Terry's books just as much as you do.

Keep smiling, Keep washing those hands but most of all, Keep breathing.

We will all get to hug again!

GNU Terry Pratchett...

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